Where's "My Life"?

One evening, I sat down thinking how long I have come, what "I was" and what "I am" and stopped at the question --- "Am I doing what -- I -- want to do?", the answer was "not everything I do is what I want to do", which led me to another question, "Where's -- My -- Life?". To seek the answer, I started out evaluating my life 5 years at a time, starting from the day I was born. Here's the train of my thoughts...

Age 0 to 5 -  For the first 5 years of my life I slept when I wanted to, ate when I wanted, played when I wanted. My home was my world. Everyone I knew, my parents, my grand parents were all special, the person I was with, was the most important at that moment in time. I tore up news papers, broke my toys, learned to stand and walk, learned to talk, learned that I can attract attention by throwing a tantrum, realized that I can melt mom, but dad was tougher. I learned to use my mother's lap as my bed, learned to make a mess, I learned that I can pinch my younger brother to make him cry and I could quickly run to the other room and run back in looking all concerned as my little darling brother was crying . There was nothing I cared about, and I was not expected to, I did what my heart said, I guess, my brain was only helping me with instant non sense.

Age 5 to 10 - I went to school, don't know what was happening, teacher said "A for Apple" and "Two Times Three is Six", and I believed it. Learnt to make friends, learned to complain, learnt that there is a variety of food beyond what my mother cooked. I learnt to use a fork to eat noodles. My teacher helped me discover the world, various continents, cities and it's peoples. When I came home to tell my dad that we live in a continent called Asia, he said he already knew about it!.

Age 10 to 15 - Learnt that I had stage fear, realized the friends can be enemies too, dad said "work hard and be competitive, you got to top the exams", I liked literature, I liked art, dad said "no way, there is no money in it, how are you going to feed your family", teachers told my parents that I was a good student, but I must work harder, dad said, "10th standard is the most important milestone and you get only one chance at it, so don't waste time". I wanted to learn to play the guitar, my dad wanted me to get trained on vocals, issue is unresolved to this date!. This was my initiation into Peer Pressure and the Rat Race.

Age 15 to 20 - "What are you going to do now? Engineering? Medicine? you must take up Science and prepare for the Entrance Tests", I told dad, I want to be a mechanic as I love automobiles, dad completed my admission formalities to study Electrical & Electronics Engineering in an Engineering College. New life, new friends, new freedom, professors are not bothered if I am present or absent in their class, they were there to do their job, i.e., deliver their lecture and get going. It is here I learnt that "teachers were working for money too", the picture of a teacher, a Guru who was preparing us to change the world was shattered. Staying in a college hostel, I realized, I have to live on a budget, bills had to be paid in time. I learned how to make five hundred rupees last for a month.

Age 20 to 25 - "Hey, you know this great IT company, they pay a big salary, they depute you around the world to work, you get to earn in Dollars, we should get IT jobs", another line of thought, "who cares for a job anyway, let's get done with Engineering first and then think what next", get a CV ready, do a software course and be ready when Companies come to the Campus, got a job, realized that it takes 10 days of work to earn Rs.1,000 and I have pay 10% of my earnings to the Government as Tax, but in college, all it would take is a phone call to dad, a cheque would arrive in 3 days. Learned that there is something called "Job Satisfaction" and I also learned that I was not satisfied!, learned to switch jobs, learned that interviews are just meetings where my interviewer is telling me that I am unfit for the job and I am trying to convince him otherwise!.

Age 25 to 30 - Have to earn more money, have to buy that cool red bike, just like my friend's, need a bigger room to stay, need a computer so I can browse the net when I get home. Have to try out swanky restaurants, watch movies, "Friday Dressing" sounds cool, I need a new wardrobe, hey you checked the new mobile phone? need that as well. How do I fund all this, it's easy, switch jobs. I wanted to make a statement that I had arrived and I needed a lifestyle to prove it. "Dad, I earn more than you!", I said, dad smiled.

Age 30 to 35 - Got married, disposable income got multiplied by 2. Need an apartment now, buy one, get a promotion, buy a car, daughter is born, watch her grow. Wife is busy taking pictures, making albums and shopping for the kid, while I tagged along figuring out what it would take to keep up with the expenses. As new parents we are trying to teach the kid to walk, to talk, to behave and what not, I now realize what my dad did for me. It's time to settle down, my outlook changed from a "Job" to a "Career", I am looking for stability, I am looking for work-life balance.

Age 35 to 40 - Which school is she going to go? Planning for my daughter's education, buy insurance polices, save for her education, plan for our retirement, "spread the risk", said the investment consultant, he said I should invest in stocks now, wife wants to buy jewelry because prices of Gold dropped by Rs.20 per gram, "what the hell? you want me to spend over Rs.100,000 to save Rs.800!, it's ridiculous", man will this ever end? Where's "my life"?

~ o ~ o ~ o ~

I don't know what life has in store for me. For once I have concluded that I won't have "my life" again, at least not in the next 3 decades or so, that is if I live that long!. The only time I did what I wanted to do was when I was less than 5 years old, I was living "My Life", but I didn't know it then!, after that it was predominantly doing what my parents wanted, what my teachers wanted, what my friends wanted, what my boss wanted. what my wife wanted, now it is what my daughter wants...

Now that I realize that "My Life" is my family, my friends and my work, then why complain? I should try to be happy to live for others in my life...

People in the project

"People" is a very important aspect of Project Management. After all, it's the people who run the project and the Manager is there to provide direction, keeping a check on things and tying aspects of the project together.

Types of people on the Project team

• The "Driver"
• The "Independent Driven"
• The "Dependent Driven"
• The "You tell me what to do" type
• The "Complainers"
• The "Pessimists"
• The "Sitting on the fence" type

These are just a few types of people we find on a project and the list is not exhaustive. The following picture provides a map and my opinion.

Dependent Driven >>> Independent Driven >>> Driver
Dependent Driven >>>>>>>>>>  "You Tell me what to do"
Dependent Driven >>> Complainer
Dependent Driven >>>>>>>>>> Pessimist


Going ahead, I would like to explain what each type means...


The "Driver"
These are people with a ton of initiative. The goal is always on top of their mind and are willing to do anything to achieve the goal; be it a coding task, a review task, a testing task, a documenting task or a training task. These people have very strong likes and dislikes on what they would like to do but dont mind spending time on doing things they dislike for the sake of the goal. I have seen very few people who belong to this category. These are the people who "make things happen" in the system and make a big contribution in project delivery, but due to the variety of jobs handled, they tend to be branded with a "lack of focus tag", but these people move on because, the goal is met, and nothing matters more.

The main issue that the "driver" face in their careers is that they have to demonstrate a lot of patience to get recognized. It takes many long hours and months of toil. This is just because, these people will go on after the goal irrespective of what is going on around them and are slow to recognize that they are missing something in life.


The "Independent Driven"
The "driven" people are ones who will take instructions from who they trust and will go ahead and wrap up the tasks as quickly as possible. They will come back only if they have a doubt. They will come back to the "driver" and ask for more work or the next assignment. These kind of people work with a high degree of efficiency and again play an important part in project delivery. These are the type of people who get the best reviews and appraisals as they demonstrate "focus" on the job and meet targets almost 100% of the times.

The "Dependent Driven"
The "Dependent Driven" people are ones who need instructions at every step on the assigned tasks. These people are committed to the job but are unsure if they are in the right direction. They ask someone they trust every time they get confused or are unsure of the direction they are moving in. This is largely due to the lack of a good understanding of the system they are working in and lack of required skill. More often that not, these people move up to the "Independent Driven" state in a few months or years. This happens due to a better understanding of the system and improved skill.

The "you tell me what to do" type
This is an interesting classification of people I have found on project teams. These are a shade different from the Drivers and I define these people as "Driver minus Initiative plus Disgruntlement". These are kind of people who have chosen to be judges of past actions from their team members, other managers or even the company in quite a number of cases. They are upset with these actions and think that they can punish or take revenge for the action even if it has not affected them directly. They think that they "feel" for the society and must do justice. Now these are conclusions that they have drawn by themselves or thru' participating in discussions with colleagues and friends. The others who participated in the discussion did not take the discussion seriously and have walked off, but these people have allowed the thoughts to linger and is affecting them. They don't know of it as yet.

These people are usually "Independent Driven" type who have demonstrated promise to be the "driver" of tomorrow and then, this sudden loss in initiative and added disgruntlement. When a task is assigned, they know what to do and make a mental map of things to do to complete the task. But then, they won't show initiative to go ahead and complete the task. They will ask the manager for more information. When the manager explains what is required to be done, they will immediately see flaws in the explanation, but won't highlight it. When they see a design flaw or risk in the implementation plan, they won't escalate it but they will know how to overcome these issues. Instead, they will choose to ignore the issues and will allow things to come to a stand still at a later date. Quite a danger to projects, these people.

I have personally tried to turn some of these people around, but it is a 50-50 chance. What usually happens is that, these people keep resisting what is good for them. The company realizes, but does not take action against this individual. The team leaders start going to next in line to clarify and to discuss, these individuals get sidelined eventually and become obsolete. These kind of people cannot be out of the lime light for a long period, so they find another job and resign, the company let's go of them because they are obsolete. Who loses? the team? the Manager? the company? the loser is the individual, and he/she will not realize it for a long time to come.

The "Complainer"

The "Complainer" is usually an under-performer and falls between the "dependent driven" and the "driver". This person has found an easy way out from any sort of commitment by complaining. This person will complain for the coffee served in office, the attitude of office help, the company policies and even their own colleagues. By complaining, these people think they will be absolved from taking responsibility. Ask them once, if they have any ideas for improvements at work, they will immediately say, it is beyond "repair". They will never say how they can help, instead, they will tell you how others can contribute to improvement. These are the types of people who resort to politics

Usually, these people are a "lost cause", the earlier the company can get rid of the person, the better it is for the team and the company.

The "Intelligent Pessimist"

The "Intelligent pessimist", in my opinion, has high intelligence and low self esteem. It is this combination, that makes them pessimistic. They demonstrate brilliance and exceed expectations in most assigned tasks. The Intelligent pessimist does not harm the project in anyway, but will always be depressed. When you ask what the problem is, they will complain of a lot of work and then they will overwork themselves just to overcome their self esteem. In-spite of playing important roles in the organization, they are not satisfied with their own output. These people do not know how to balance their personal and professional lives.

It is a task in it self to manage the "Intelligent pessimist" and one has to exercise caution while doing so.

The "Sitting on the fence" type

These are the people who are within the system but always on the lookout for a better "opportunity". They are always looking at what others are wearing, what others are driving and live in an ideal world that just works perfectly for them. They want to be the most recognized, they want to get paid the best salaries, wear the best clothes, expensive watches and drive big cars and want to have the perfect work-life balance. These are the people who will always participate in every discussion with a limited knowledge and will not leave an opportunity to be the MC on any occasion.

These are people with intelligence, but do not believe in expanding on their knowledge. They want to rise in the organization structure early just because they think there is little work to do when you get to the top, they don't realize the importance of ownership, accountability and qualities of leadership.

In most occasions, these people either realize and move to "driver" or move to "you tell me what to do" positions. Once they move to the latter spot, their career is over.

Conclusion

Interesting points to note in this analysis of people are:

1. No one but oneself can move from one stage to another
2. No amount of training can take you from one stage to another, unless one participates whole-heartedly and contributes.
3. The only states that are related strongly with each other are "dependent driven", "independent driven" and "driver". Hence I call these the "In-Line States". Others are weakly related or not related to each other.
4. All people join teams at the "dependent driven" state. From here, it is up to the person to make it.
5. An individual does not choose which state to be in or which state to move to. Instead, it is the circumstances and other people in the team or friends who contribute to the individual's movement to a state. Individuals get motivated and inspired by the words of their colleagues and friends and move on the "In-Line States" or away from the "In-Line States", mostly people tend to move away, the managers need to keep a watch.